Grrrrr....
I start in the last blog to talk about this but i trapped myself in thoughts. Deeper then i wanted....so...i stopped..had a smoke......and here i am now....
I start thinking about this because i have to create the contract between the goddess and the sub....was an idea started from the part with submission..because i saw that i am the one who always take all this in serious....and the rest are just trying and after they see that actually is serious...and actually this is not a game and im not just a beautiful, sexy women who is acting here a roll....they get scared...they feel ashamed...and they run away......and i always feel that i failed. And i always have to burn myself and rise again as a phoenix from my own ashes...
So..i decided to create a contract....just to start from the beginning with the right foot..and to force them somehow to open their eyes from the beginning...because a contract means a responsibility they have to assume too...and the action to see that in front of your eyes has an big impact....so..im doing this.
Now...ok ok....the contract...easy to be sad...hard to make it....because even for me..is a minde fuck...its reality slapping that...im responsible for the other ones evolution and life...even if its throw domination......its still the same story....
Crazy..because im doing it every day....from some years..but somehow....i didnt focused..or i was not so conscious about that im actually assuming this for real.....even if i did it....was the same impact....in mee too....all is about understanding all what im doing on my own skin right...so here it is again..the same even if im the one who creates it...had the same mind fuck even for me...a slap of reality...like wake up goddess....are you sure that you want to assume all over and over? are you sure that this is the path that you want to step in from now on? because again..its not a game that you start and...you can just stop because you are tired..or or or...no way...you step in it...and....you have to continue it.....so....? what do you say goddess....are you actually ready for this part?
The answer is clear...its a yes...because i do it everyday somehow...even in virtual even in real with the persons i have near....somehow i take the responsibility of my reality everyday.....so..its nothing new....but.....because i know all this.....and i know how painful it is....and im an empath and a healer and i take all the negativity on me everytime....i stopped a little to think...if actually i want it.....its a choice now....what do i want?
Im conscious about the fact that from all the cases i will work with...as before..most of them will fail...just because humans are so afraid of pain....emotional one is the hardest..they actually chose to destroy their body..but not to be touched emotional. And the curiosity is that they are not actually conscious that they are in that pain every single sec....because they carry that pain everyday..but they act like they don’t have if. Pretend that they are not feeling it....because is more painful to just admit that you suffer then actually to suffer.....and they are all in suffering non-stop..but act like they are not..pretend that all is
ok..and this is happiness...until...someone like me..put the reality in front of them...then the hell starts....for everyone..including for me.....because from that moment..i opened the hell gates..and demons invade them..their own demons...i clicked that part of the brain where all the negative side of who you are is stuck.....and now..the hell begins...even if you choose to run...they will fallow you......you carry them inside of you....and brain creates and give all them..and body reacts and produce all kind of hormones...so you will be a
chaos.....even if you ran from me....because its not about me..its about what you have inside.....its non important if you have me in front or not..because you are the one who has all that luggage not me.....im just the one who..open the door of your own hell...thats all
So....most of them run.....most of them blame me...most of them are fighting....and acuse and and and...for everything......its a hell of a job to be a dark healer....ha ha ha
But from time to time you have some....who...succeed...who become conscious about all...who pass in that hell...and let me to guide them throw it....and wowwww......we are out..we see the lights....and its amazing.....
But that just..the first step.....for the first fear..or....first bad feeling which was stuck there.....and..other will come.....but...now you know how...you saw that the hell its not so bad to step in...was actually more dark.. when you just stood and looked at it,to step in to or not...then to be in it actually.....you know why? because you are not alone.....im here...and maybe im bad with you...maybe i hurt you but im doing it just to not let you to stuck yourself in it..i force you to continue to walk through it...because i know.....i know that place so well...and i know that you will see the light soon if you still walking...
So..just trust me...and follow me.....thats all what you have to do.....thats all.
Grrrrr...and again the idea was to explain the responsibility but....i trapped myself in thoughts......ha ha ha.....ok..another smoke to get out from....or....my kids just saved me from this..they just start to do things near me and to put questions so i can t not focus anymore on..creating the hell.....ha ha ha.....
If i dont stop..they will start creating a hell for real near mee...and again i will have to deal with it....ha ha ha..bye dear reader....